Every Detail

This past month has been about focusing on each day and small accomplishments. I have had days where I have had energy and there have been days where I am completely exhausted. There have been days where I think I can keep going and days where I don't know how I will. The first week of June I completed my first round of chemo. It did make me more tired and I had some nausea but it was manageable and I am thankful that it went as well as it did. I also have been going to occupational and physical therapy which has been challenging. I still have numbness and weakness on my left side and so my balance is still off and doing even simple things can be difficult but I'm seeing improvements. I have been able to tie my shoes again, fold laundry, make a meal by myself, and put on my kitchen gloves and get all my fingers in the right place. I'm also excited that I have been able to do Addy's hair and take care of Kierstyn more on my own. It has been the small things that I notice and that I'm thankful for. They are things that normally I wouldn't even think about but they are some of my accomplishments. It is definitely going to take time and I still have a lot to work on but this past week has been encouraging. I have been able to spend more time with family and friends and I have had several days where I felt well and was able to go through the day without needing to sleep. Tomorrow, I will be going to Johns Hopkins to have another MRI and to meet with my doctor to see if there has been any improvement since last months scans. I am so thankful for all the prayers and support that you have been giving me. Your messages of encouragement remind me that I am not alone in this and that we are loved and cared for by God and by each other. I have been praying constantly for God to protect my mind and my heart and that I will continue to trust Him with each day. I'm thankful for the strength He gives me in my weakness. I have been encouraged by the verse: The Lord directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives. (Psalm 37:23 NLT). It gave me so much comfort to be reminded that He knows and cares about everything I am facing and He will show me the way if I stay close to Him.  He knows my pain, He knows my hopes, He knows every detail of today and tomorrow and I can trust Him and be thankful. 

I will bless the Lord who guides me; even at night my heart instructs me. I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me. No wonder my heart is glad, and I rejoice. My body rests in safety. You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever. (Psalms 16:7-9, 11 NLT)